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Finally candid answers to all those important and sometimes embarrassing Jewish dating questions!!! Presenting the debut column of Frumma Frumsky. Ask Frumma all your questions that have yet to be answered properly and honestly by someone who actually knows what religious singles truly have to deal with and understands how to deal with
these issues.
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Subject: Hashavat AveidaDear Efrum and Frumma, |
Dear Leah, First and foremost, IGNORE EFRUM. As a tried-and-true loser of all sorts of things... expensive jewelry, siddurim, self-respect, you know the drill... I appreciate your resolve to return that lost item of communion with G-d despite the slim-to-none chances that you will find its original owner. You restore our faith in the belief that the littany of Tehillim chain emails are more than just cyberechos and the stimulus for hitting delete in our inboxes. Although perhaps your actions are slightly unwarranted due to the lack of uniquely identifying marks and the public nature of where it was lost. Good luck on your quest. If you spice it up a bit, you know, start a website or something... "haveyouseenLeah.com" that sells T-shirts with the slogan and a siddur image, you might actually even make a buck and have a better chance of finding the chicka! before you know it, you'll be featured everywhere from the jewish week to the village voice. you become a cyberfreakgoddess, land a possibly over-zealous, idealistic jewish dude with good looks and charm, and whamo, you're life's been super-karma-ed-out by your good deed. go for it. good luck babe... but remember, you got the idea here first. ;) Frumma |
Leah, Some would say your devotion is admirable, but I would add that it's also a wee bit stalkerish and somewhat depressing. I think siddur-losing Leah might have gotten over it... say... 15 years ago or so. And if my bar-mitzvah sefarim haul taught me anything, it's that where there's one book, there are many, many, duplicate books that you wish would have been cash instead so you could have bought a new Sega system like your friends instead of having shelves full of dusty old books and your friends laughing at you and a low-self-esteem-driven eating disorder. So instead of scaring the skirt off of siddur-losing Leah through some absurdly complex sleuthing and borderline psychotic fixation, perhaps you should do what any devoted Jew and any real American would do: sell it on eBay. Efrum |
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Note: The views and opinions expressed here are that of Ms. Frumma Frumsky. They may not necessarily represent the opions of the site, staff or members. This section is meant to address issues in observant dating. The responses may include sarcastic remarks, or humorous statements intended to make light of the question, answer and perhaps the situation as well. We are not responsible if you decide to take or ignore the advice given in this column.
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