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	Subject	Re	Created By	Start Date	Last Post
	Jews of color	[21]	Bechirah	17 Mar 19:23	20 Jun 17:20
	Feedback for Inappropriate Profiles	[12]	Anonymous	16 Jan 23:07	5 Apr 11:24
	marriage & prostitution	[28]	SimpleMan	13 Mar 14:57	4 Apr 20:01
	Evil plan to get more dates	[35]	Anonymous	6 Jan 01:19	18 Feb 11:50
	Get together in Brooklyn	[2]	Single&Frum	23 Mar 16:56	18 Feb 11:45
Page 1 of 6 1 ·2·3·4·5·6 Total of 28 Threads

Size Matters
I'm a woman who has always been attracted to men of a large (solid) build. I've heard that there are men who truly like a voluptuous figure, but I've only ever met one (and he was already taken). Is this as uncommon as it seems? Are most men really only attracted to very thin women? (By "voluptuous," I mean two armsful not someone your arms don't reach around.)
By: Devash

Comments:

I will speak for myself. Full figured is okay, too large or heavy is not.

Depends on the person.

Jmnor55 14 Dec 4PM

I was doing research a couple of years ago, and I read an article in Lilith Magazine about eating disorders in the Jewish community. The article included a diagram of women's figures showing that while most women think that men prefer someone who is ultra-thin (a waif), in reality most men prefer someone who has more of a figure than a waif.

Zalmo 15 Dec 5PM

Devash:

I don't think that men are only attracted to very thin waif-like women, but I think that there has been psychology research showing that men prefer a certain waist-hip ratio, and also prefer women with body mass index in the range 19-24 or so. (Google "BMI calculators" for info.)

Interestingly, there is recent research that lower BMI is associated with higher fertility: if I recall correctly, women with higher BMI have more difficulty conceiving and perhaps fewer miscarriages, so it seems like there is a reason for the attraction difference. Search pubmed.gov for that. Lower BMI even within normal range is associated with lower risk of death at any age --- see Walt Willett's book Eat Drink and Be Healthy (he's a nutritionist at Harvard public health).

I speak from the standpoint of someone who was borderline overweight (just under BMI 25) for a really long time and really liked my body as it was, but on a whim I decided to lose 5 pounds by reading the newspaper on the elliptical machine every day for 500 calories each time and was shocked how liberating it felt, given that I was actually very happy with my body in the first place. It is a weird feeling to realize that I am actually not "big boned".

After writing so many personal details, this post better be anonymous! :-)

Anonymous - 2 Jan 9PM

I don't think size matters. I have dated woman who were a little overweight and they looked pretty attractive. To me I can get attracted to a girl unless she looks very ugly.

Eli 12 Jan 7PM

bottom line, everyone has differrent tastes. differrent strokes for differrent folks. Although physical attraction is very significant, Emotional bonding is even more important.but I would agree that a fundamentally non-attractive person would be impossible to relate to even emotionally.

gr8guy 13 Jan 3PM

your more voluptuous aspects , hmm I wonder what those would be....

Anonymous - looking for a grrl - 13 Jan 3PM

very intersting how guys want women who are slender and under size 10 but some men arent so fit themselves or take proper care of themselves.. Shouldn't it matter about the females heart and soul and not just about the figure. Mind you if the guy shows the female he cares about her she may tend to lose weight in order to keep him around. The average size for a women now is 14. I think its nicer to have something to grab on too then just bones.

Anonymous - 23 Jan 12AM

petite is different from thin, as it implies short as well.

on average, guys want girls of average height (not too short, not too tall).

Anonymous - 23 Jan 10AM

bravo, sassy. you're one sample point. obviously the men you dated said that; if they were dating you then presumably they were attracted to you (and besides, could they tell you otherwise? "honey, short women are repuslive" - ya I'm sure they would say that to you).

just as a reference point: average american female height is 5' 4"

Anonymous - 23 Jan 11AM

interesting stat: average height of Miss America winner is 5' 6.5"

Anonymous - gilad - 23 Jan 11AM

Personally Ive always preferred shorter women.

gr8guy 23 Jan 12PM

wow --- spectacular!!!!!

Anonymous - sassylover - 23 Jan 12PM

Personally I've always preferred someone with a decent personality over any particluar height... but then it looks like I'm in the minority...

Harper 23 Jan 1PM

personality yes, but personality and height etc. -- WOW!!!

gr8guy 23 Jan 4PM

i don't mean to offend... does anyone notice ashkenazi girls to be on average shorter than sefardi girls?? is it just me?? that's the way it seems to me...

SimpleMan 23 Jan 6PM

Ashkenazi vs. Sephardim height differences?? I'm not sure I was married to a very pettite Sephardic type.

However this sounds like a job for Ari. He could run his database looking at Gender, Ethnicity, and height and come up with a mean and standard deviation for each gender/ethnicity combo.

The reason we need both is to give us an idea if the statistics he has are meaningful. That is, is the sample size large enough.

So how about it Ari? Up for the challenge ;-)

I would even be willing to do the math part.

Harper 24 Jan 1AM

I'm rather thin and handsome B"H and I've dated girls who look every which way. Thin, average, fat, tall, short, etc. To me, personality and values are more important than anything else. Who says fat = unattractive???

Anonymous - AmIAloneHere? :-) - 22 Mar 11AM

You can't SassyChick. Such a man doesn't exist.

Anonymous - AmIAloneHere? :-) - 22 Mar 6PM

i'm a voluptuous woman also... and you're right Devash....size does matters!
see,people see a few extra pounds and they back off,,,,what they really don't know is that they're missing out....
because of this prejudice ,the woman are more done to earth and have lots of love and compasion to give....
they 're not superficial and they see the good things in people and the faults!!!
think about it....
it's just my opinion!

PS: i'm NOt talking about the seriously overweight people......

leah_15 10 Aug 4PM

MENCH first , MUNCH later.
If she's not a mentch I don't care what she looks like and if she is a mench, she looks just fine to me.
A few pounds more, a few pounds less doesn't matter.

kosherstrudel 16 Nov 7AM

OK all this few extra pounds just drives me nuts. Provide a picture and that's it. People are attracted by sight first then the rest comes into play. Someon and I do mean someone is going to like you for who you are but why not make the attempt to change and take pride in your body? I had a similar situation that I was overweight, met some girl, told me after 3 days that she wasn't physically attracted to me and I got mad worked out and now not only do I have more confidence but more self esteem. And that is the true nature of everythig self love.

Who cares what other people think? If you love yourself then trust me someone will come and sooner than you think.

JEWBAN518 1 Dec 5PM

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